Happy girls exchanging gifts.

The Expression…

on those women’s faces says it all.  Those expressions indicate the emotions of the act of gift giving.  Both parties benefit from gift giving.  Gift giving from the heart strengthens relationships adding to the quality of life.  The recipient receives not only the gift but the feelings behind the gift.  The gift is a physical representation of the giver’s feelings.  The giver also receives the gift of making someone they care about feel good.  Those are only jobs of gift giving.  The given gift’s job is not meant to add to clutter but to evoke warm and fuzzy feelings. It is to let the recipient know how the gift giver feels about them.  Job Done!

Gift Receiver, Don’t Let Guilt Allow Gifts to Add to Your Clutter

We love the fact that someone thought enough about us to spend their time and money to give us something. We all have had those gifts from loved ones that didn’t fit in our life or our taste.   They often don’t know what to do with it because they do not want to hurt the giver’s feelings.  Feeling guilty is a powerful emotion and can stand in the way of what is good for us.  Clutter is not good for us.  It takes up valuable space both physically and visually.

The Reality, We All Need Less Clutter

Once a gift is given than it no longer belongs to the giver.  It now belongs to the receiver.   The receiver can now do anything they please with the gift.  The giver should not be displeased or upset if they don’t use the gift as the they intended.  It is no longer theirs and the gift did its job.  Keeping items that have no place in your life out of guilt only adds to your clutter.  Regifting is a wonderful option, if it is the right gift for the intended recipient.

‘I love that you thought of me and took your valuable time and money to give me this gift.  Know that your gift has done its job and I thank you.’  If you must own up to the fact that the gift has moved on…’I am hoping that it makes someone as happy as I was when I received it.’

Updated December 11 2024

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The problem lies in the emotional attachment to too many things

The belief that objects are of greater value than just their function or appearance

The Empty Chair

is an emotional attachment and is symbolic of the missing person in our life.  The chair on its own has no emotion.  It is who sat in that chair is what attaches emotion to the chair.  Leaving the chair in the room is a constant reminder of what was.  The past and not the future.  Will you forget the person who sat in that chair if the chair is no longer there?  I think for some that is a real fear, if the chair goes away, the memory goes with it.  Do you think you could completely erase them from your brain because an object is gone.

It is better for your mental health if there isn’t a constant reminder that the person is no longer with you in the physical world.  Not having constant reminders will help you to live in the present moment.

Gifts

 Guilt is the emotion often attached to gifts.  ‘So & So’ gave this to me.  Even though I don’t like it and use it, I can’t get rid of it.’  What is the purpose of a gift?  It is to let someone know that you care about them.  Once it is given, its job is done.  The object now belongs to you and it is yours to do with what you please.  Read this blog post to better understand the job of gifts Gifts Can Add to Clutter

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The spring is a busy time for the earth and should be for you also.  To help you get started, there are 11 steps to an enjoyable summer listed below.  It’s time to get ready for what’s to come, the cookouts, picnics, water sports and more.  Inflation is on the rise, the price of gas skyrocketing, stock market woos, the war with Ukraine and supply chain challenges are still occurring, you will want to be sure you’re spending your money wisely.  It could also mean a change in your vacation plans or perhaps you will be staying closer to home this summer. The objective for you is to know what you have, what you need and what brings a smile to your face.  With this 11 step guide, you will be proactive instead of reactive so you can spend more time like this, enjoying your summer.

1. Rid the patio and deck of last falls leaves and downed limbs. Sweep it clean.
2. Clean up the yard.  Take inventory of garden supplies needed to keep your yard looking its best.
3. Pull out the pots and plant some colorful flowers.
4. Drag out the outdoor dining set and any other patio furniture.
5. Check you outdoor furniture for wear and tear as you are cleaning it.
6. The grill needs to be ready for all those great outdoor times so be sure it is clean and you have plenty of fuel for your unit.
7. Check and clean your grill tools.
8. Next inventory your outdoor dining supplies such as paper plates, cups, utensils napkins, tablecloths, etc.
9. Check and do maintenance on the pool and any water sports equipment you have.
10. Get out all pool towels and beach wear and assess their usefulness.
11. Write down what you need and go shopping!

Now You are Ready for Summer, Enjoy!

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You think they do but your kids really don’t want your collections.  They are uniquely yours.   You have spent many hours and dollars.  Consequentially, you have put so much of yourself in to your collections.  Your take great joy in your collectables.  You take great pride in displaying them.  They have great meaning for you.  They are an expression of yourself, a passion of yours.  Again, notice all the you’s and your’s.

Ask them

Are they interested?  Secondly, ask them if they are interested in any of the pieces.  Do your kids share in your passion of the collections?  Yes, great! No? Why not? It’s a fantastic collection you spent years collecting.  It is better for you to edit your collections. Once you decide what is ready to move on, sell them.  Keep the parts of it that you truly love.  You know their monetary value and where is the best place to sell them.  More importantly, you will have recouped more of your money.  However, if left to your children.  there is the possibility they would sell the entire collection for a lot less than their value, since they don’t know their true value.

Your kids don’t want your set of china

The set of china for 12 with three different sizes of goblets that make your table look so elegant.  They don’t want all of the crystal, silver and table linens that you have.  You could breakdown the setting of 12 into (2) 6’s or (3) 4’s if that works.  The problem is, is that people just don’t entertain like they used to.  When was the last time you used all that stuff?

When was the last time you used…?  Depending on your situation, start going through your house as if you were going to move.  With that attitude in mind, ultimately, you will ask yourself do I really need and love this.

If your family has a unique set of circumstances or if you find this challenging just as many do, contact me to discuss your situation.

The final installment will offer suggestions on how to disburse what you are willing to let go.  As a result, you won’t be dumping your stuff on your kids.

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